When
I am about becoming a regular columnist at many yahoo
groups, I decided it would be a good idea for me to write
articles that would be helpful to beginners. Thinking
about possible subjects for these articles got me reminiscing
back to a time few years ago.
It
would in fact be safe to say that I was pretty clue less
in most areas surrounding my crossdressing. Meetings I
made with several friends and got lots of good information.
You will even find some of that advice in some of articles
in the site, but looking back now I realize that there
were still plenty of “secrets”, tips and pieces
of information. What I have put together is short lists
of those things that I would pass on to anyone taking
those first very important steps.
Emotional
Advice / Help:
1)
There is NOTHING wrong with being a crossdresser and you
should never be ashamed of being yourself. If it makes
you happy and hurts no one then don’t sweat it. When
I was finally able to let go of the guilt surrounding
my crossdressing my quality of life increased dramatically.
2)
Don’t let anyone including yourself tell you that
you can never pass. If it is important to you and you
are willing to work at it, it will happen in time.
3)
We crossdressers always tend to want to move very quickly
after we get that first taste of freedom with our gender
expression. Because of that we have to be extra sure that
we give plenty of time and space to those close to us
to sort out their feelings about our crossdressing.
4)
Gender is a journey and you never know where it will lead
you. Don’t make promises you may have to break later.
I remember ten years ago swearing that I would never want
to go out in public dressed. Now-a-days I can’t get
out enough.
5)
If you haven’t done so already, join a support group.
I feel that one of the most potentially destructive aspects
of crossdressing is the secrecy and loneliness that can
accompany it. You need a place where you can totally be
yourself, get support and talk to others who have been
there.
Practical
Advice / Help:
1)
You can get away with buying some parts of your wardrobe
cheaply, but never skimp on the quality of your wig. Cheap
wigs look bad, don’t last and will get you clocked
in two seconds flat.
2)
If you have large feet like I do (women’s 13w) you
don’t have to pay outrageous prices for shoes. Most
Payless stores in larger urban areas carry up to a size
13. I have picked up a pair of shoes there for as little
as Rs.200/-.
3)
Shopping for women’s clothes can seem like a scary
task, but remember that you have a right to be there just
like anyone else. Whether you are crossdressed or in drab
sales people should treat you with respect and sensitivity.
4)
For applying makeup it is well worth your while to invest
in a lighted makeup mirror. Used ones can usually be found
at thrift shops for as little as a few Ruppes. Make sure
the mirror has a magnifying side to it.
5)
Don’t waste your money on breast creams, home “permanent”
hair removal systems or “amazing” natural feminizing
pills. They don’t work.
If any of the above advice/help saves just one person
a little time, money or heartache I have done my job.
If I have helped you, why not drop me a mail? or still
need any help/support then write to me
contactme@radharani.com
